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Wednesday, October 14, 2009

Society we Live in

Wednesday October 14, 2009

Today morning I called up my brother(cousin) for some help (assistance) I needed, he said he is not in the town(he stays in Jaipur) and went to Jodhpur; to attend one of our cousin’s engagement. I don’t know what but I felt that people around him (my first cousins only, uncles, aunts) asked who is this and when they found it is me then I heard ‘Oh’… I don’t know what I did wrong with them or to anybody so that people take me like ‘Oh’… why they are so full of hatred and bad feelings for me.

I know we all need family and many says they are family men/women. However those who says (to me) that and I can feel sometimes when they are down (one or two drinks) they accept they are not that happy and they hate this and that. They want to be free like (say me) but they are in society and because of that they can’t. Why so hypocrite.

I believe Society is made by us only, if we are with such dual standards and dual thinking for anyone (for me all have) then you are not making a better society… you are not making better world. I see people having double standards and yet they are kept on doing this… don’t they have self respect.

Why people treat me like this because back there in my hometown people have enough time to do this sort of things and they all have their own false ego… they don’t speak truth et al and they always portray what they are not. It hardly hit back to them as to whom they are portraying that he/she is also doing the same thing.

I was excited till today that I am going home and will meet people out there, now I am not… I will go home meet my parents and stay at home only…

Here people respect the other person only if he/ she is doing what they say and what makes their false ego bigger. I am not that types and once I tried to do so… I did what they said… but soon I realized I can’t do that for a long and it happened naturally to me that I can’t stand for such a false things.. I did that because it was making them happy and I did that for their happiness… but my mind and heart gave up… So back there people (around me there ) took me as social catastrophe and treat me like that.

I can say it hardly affects me… But I knew deep down inside to answer them and to say make them feel that they are wrong I have to do something big…… then I think should I do that.. for them ?? who they are no one !!! I go there max twice in a year… so they hardly matters to me… am I breaking some nature’s law which say we are social animal and we should stay in society… Can’t we build a new society around us…

Does that mean if you are single then people in society should (must) look at you with one eyebrow up and thinking that there is something fishy with that guy. Why you want to get married when you didn’t find someone suitable for you… get married to only one with you are compatible and vice versa… speak upfront and try to be clear… second if your chemistry and wavelength (mental and thought) match then only you should get married to that person… as you are planning to stay with that one for next 30 years at least…

I found that and realized this again and again that Success is a relative term… Brings many relatives along with and with your goodwill you cannot charm people for long… people out there understand only language of money… you bribe them with gifts and talk all good about the (though they are wrong and not good)… they will do best marketing for you and they will work as your PR personnel out there and make a good image of yours.

That is what we are living with and this what we call a society…. I am happy that I am alone and Single…. Away from this day to day drama and society responsibility (which is not a responsibility at all)… I am happy with my activities which I do under CSR and I know my social responsibility to make a better world…

Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa !!!!!!!!!!!! I……

Tuesday, July 7, 2009

India Inc wakes up to social media

Tuesday July 7, 2009

Morning when I was entering the office I saw one magazine kept near sofa, on cover page I saw some familiar logos like Twitter, Facebook, LinkedIn then for a second I stopped by and read the line “India Inc wakes up to social media”



I came in and after some usual work I couldn’t resist myself to find that article online. Found it and after reading it I thought to update my blog. From last few weeks am thinking on things to do and things which are happening in and around. I believe my thought sometimes (rather all the times) are scattered and they kept of wandering in the space to find the answers… answers are there however due to not so focused approach am not able to find them. Like I say I live in a material world and whatever happens around me affects me, I met many people online and gone through their profiles.. they have transformed yes transformed because considering the change is to time ratio that is huge and people has done remarkable things in short time and got recognition. Recognition I believe is one thing which is bigger than the money. I met those people (Julia Roy, Akanksha Redhu, Neha Tiwari, Naina Redhu) on social media/ networking website and found them interesting and impressed by their work.

I sometimes feel am at the wrong place, I do not belong here… writing code and doing same work… I believe I belong to internet… then why am here why not like others (okay here again comparison) am doing things online and make my own outstanding, I guess my excuse (yes excuse not reason…accept it) for this is I am bound by many things and am not focused.. what I do to be focused… nothing !!! when I read such things and feel I can also do things like this and a lot better than this then for time being I get focused and with time it all settled down. It gives me irritating feeling that I don’t want to be like others who just live.. I want to be a part of that group who makes the difference.. I have to be disciplined and regular…

I promised myself that I will make one post everyday on my blog… like that I can with time make some presence on internet and then can say am doing things from quite some time. Now after so many days am posting again…

I promised myself that I will study regularly and hard so that I can come out from this rat race.. coz I believe only higher education can catapult my career now not simple every year changes.. what I want from life is I want to make a difference.. I read every day in newspaper that some guy did some remarkable… now go back to that guy’s profile and check out what and when he did… first help yourself then help others… am not helping myself!!!!

I promised myself that by the time now I will be a happy and relaxed person… am I ??? I guess I will never… coz my priorities are different from others and my thinking level is different.. and you cannot change a person until he/she want to change himself/herself by own. That is all mind set and willingness to change.

Hope Now I get focused as I am done with my work quite some.. and writing blog. I sometimes feel scared and not free.. why I don’t know. Why am scared and from whom am scared. I applied simple theory.. that when I do something wrong or don’t do what I a meant to do then I feel scared. I am also scared of change though change is inevitable but it gives me those sleepless nights… but it helps me to grow.

Hope this time change will come after some time and I will stay put and learn new things.

If you read again you will find mixture of thought and kind of mess of thought (*yes that is the right word)… I will keep on blogging and update here with new mess-of-thoughts

Friday, June 26, 2009

I started yesterday for my home to attend a marriage back here...many things happened on the way.. i thought to write them in some chronological order.. but not today thought to write that in some time...but when i came home then i got some shocking news and some updates which I expected to hear well before...

My mom had High Blood Pressure problem and she was admit in hospital for 3 days.... no body informed for that... then after that my dad met an accident and again am not informed... Now I am feeling bit different, I don't know why they didn't told me about that. Those two things now people are say were real serious and critical but why then nobody informed me. I am now not able to understand the seriousness of the situation now... and what should I do... how should i react to this. I am not that bad dad....


I am not feeling bad and am feeling bad for that that am not feeling bad for this.... Damn !!!! am not suppose to write a blog here when am on vacation and attending a marriage.. but these things made me to think what I am and why I am like this...so writing this blog !!!!!