Today is Saturday morning.. ok now noon... just woke up and found a note on the door that my friends whom i live with.. some of them went home already and some of them off to mumbai... so this weekend i will be alone... it haunted me first then I thought let me think and let me think deep about myself... I was thinking what I have to do and what i have done...
I posted two days back about escapism and yesterday I chalk down the plan what I am doing and what is wrong in it... then i changed approach and now i have 5 days with me to implement that.... to show some output... output really make you feel better and confident... Yeah people one more thing.......yesterday I got and kind of award for my services towards Community relattion.
So now am feeling bit focused.. i guess so...
Another thing is when i found i am alone for whole two days it was mixed feeling... then i opened my orkut account and saw new updates for some of my friend... one of them is Vikas Bahar I really miss him... he was the person who created BladeRunnerzzz our biking group. Really missing him a lot... felt so lonely !!!!
Vikas All the best my friend... we will meet soon again... world is not so big that we lost easily :)
Saturday, April 4, 2009
Thursday, April 2, 2009
Escapism
I don't know from whom am running away, from whom am trying to stay away, from whom I am scared.. yes I am scared. I don't know why I feel so unsecure, uncertain about everything.
I am escaping from one situation which am facing currently... It is not like I can't do it but it is taking a lot of time to complete the task and for which am not happy. I feel so scared even to get out of my flat... is it Escapism or is it simple unsecurity which make me feel paranoid.
I don't know what is it but it really haunting me... it make me feel you are alone and trust no one. whyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy
Though I want to connect to new people I want to meet new people I want to know more about the world, so I created my profiel on Twitter @subhashbohra http://twitter.com/subhashbohra but then also I feel people are doing many things and am no where... why i compare myself with other... i think this way i can evaluate myself... however it make me feel low then also i can't resist to compare myself with almost everything...
I started writing blog some time ago but I can see myself as a lazy guy who is always confused about many things... who is not having rock solid FOCUS of any thing. Who start many things but with time pufff !!! all gone... I can't keep pace with that all. I want to do many things in life and I know what they are and how to start but that lazy guy over powers and am still here....
Hope this time I will as I have started again... I will reach some place which will make me feel better and secure.
-Subhash
I am escaping from one situation which am facing currently... It is not like I can't do it but it is taking a lot of time to complete the task and for which am not happy. I feel so scared even to get out of my flat... is it Escapism or is it simple unsecurity which make me feel paranoid.
I don't know what is it but it really haunting me... it make me feel you are alone and trust no one. whyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy
Though I want to connect to new people I want to meet new people I want to know more about the world, so I created my profiel on Twitter @subhashbohra http://twitter.com/subhashbohra but then also I feel people are doing many things and am no where... why i compare myself with other... i think this way i can evaluate myself... however it make me feel low then also i can't resist to compare myself with almost everything...
I started writing blog some time ago but I can see myself as a lazy guy who is always confused about many things... who is not having rock solid FOCUS of any thing. Who start many things but with time pufff !!! all gone... I can't keep pace with that all. I want to do many things in life and I know what they are and how to start but that lazy guy over powers and am still here....
Hope this time I will as I have started again... I will reach some place which will make me feel better and secure.
-Subhash
Monday, January 5, 2009
Six Nights and Seven Days
Wrote Some Post in last few weeks.. was unable to publish so publishing Now.
Monday, December 15, 2008 12:39:00 PM
I watched one Movie I guess on Saturday or on Sunday Night, it was on star movies. Movie Name was “Six Nights and Seven Days”. I kind of liked the movie, specifically in the end there was conversation between the Leas actress and her boyfriend, the boyfriend said he is guilty that he cheated her when he thought she is dead and then lead actress said she also felt in love with Quinn (Harrison Ford). Then they said this should not have happened if they were in love.
Nice situation and very well said, if you are in love with someone, love means a lot it is not just four letter word, I faced that and I have seen someone, she was in love with one guy that much that no one can distract her from her focus. She was and is rock solid in her thought that she has to marry that one guy only no matter who so ever come to me and asks me to marry.
I salute that love, that Love is everything. I wonder why people cheat their partners, are they not in love with them or something else. Why just they don’t talk. Why infidelity. I mean if you are in love with some one then you never cheat, you accept rather you love what he or she is, you take all likes and dislikes and you feel comfortable inside. That one make your heart beat faster and slower at same time. The feeling of love makes you feel happy and you concentrate better on what you do.
Ahhh… I felt only once and then it was gone, Second time I felt again and then it was not made for me. Now am back to blog J
Sometimes I wonder why human being felt so, I thought I will never feel such again in my life, but I felt and when I didn’t get that then I was sad. I guess that is how god created us with Mind and heart.
Monday, December 15, 2008 12:39:00 PM
I watched one Movie I guess on Saturday or on Sunday Night, it was on star movies. Movie Name was “Six Nights and Seven Days”. I kind of liked the movie, specifically in the end there was conversation between the Leas actress and her boyfriend, the boyfriend said he is guilty that he cheated her when he thought she is dead and then lead actress said she also felt in love with Quinn (Harrison Ford). Then they said this should not have happened if they were in love.
Nice situation and very well said, if you are in love with someone, love means a lot it is not just four letter word, I faced that and I have seen someone, she was in love with one guy that much that no one can distract her from her focus. She was and is rock solid in her thought that she has to marry that one guy only no matter who so ever come to me and asks me to marry.
I salute that love, that Love is everything. I wonder why people cheat their partners, are they not in love with them or something else. Why just they don’t talk. Why infidelity. I mean if you are in love with some one then you never cheat, you accept rather you love what he or she is, you take all likes and dislikes and you feel comfortable inside. That one make your heart beat faster and slower at same time. The feeling of love makes you feel happy and you concentrate better on what you do.
Ahhh… I felt only once and then it was gone, Second time I felt again and then it was not made for me. Now am back to blog J
Sometimes I wonder why human being felt so, I thought I will never feel such again in my life, but I felt and when I didn’t get that then I was sad. I guess that is how god created us with Mind and heart.
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